Hieronymous 707

Phew! Back to some manly talk. Here’s a blog I stumbled upon in an attempt to look up some guy called J. Corey Connor on LinkedIn. It was one of those things where I received a friend request from an unknown entity and wanted to make sure everything was copascetic before I clicked “Accept.” Little did I know that my journey of discovery would have me laughing for the next 45 minutes, passively reading for the next few days, and earning myself what may turn out to be a lifelong penpal.

Corey goes by the online persona of Hieronymous 707. Also known as “Hi” or “707” for short. He writes a blog called The Hymns of Hieronymous 707 on which he post the most whimsical and comical poetry I have read in a long time. It reminds me greatly of the poems of Dr. Seuss in  Green Eggs and Ham and of T.S Eliot in Old Possums’s Book of Practical Cats. It was here, that I found myself laughing nonstop at each whimsical “whit of wit” as he put it.

Corey’s humour is not for the faint of heart as he sometimes uses explicit and vulgar language in his poems. His views on pot, marijuana, or “The Holy Shit” as he calls it may also not be pleasing to you. However, his lyrical, whimsical, comical, and often satirical lexical ministrations of logic will usually either be cause for laughter or food for thought. For a taste of what I’m talking about, I leave you with the introductory paragraph to his blog:

Proposition Hieronymous: I propose to posit prose poetry, forming a form of continuous connectivity to communicate considerable contemplative reflectivity. Simply put, I pose this where prose poetry is what you’ll hear when wondering where the time went while reading such rhyme wonderments as oft I’ve wrought, and revealed thusly; each whit of wit written Hieronymously.

Damola Mabogunje

Software Engineer by day, Blogger, Poet and Author, by night, I spend my days writing everything from the convex comma, to highly complex code.

One thought on “Hieronymous 707

  1. On the principle of “show, don’t tell,” here’s a sample of Hieronymous 707’s poetry.

    Stephan, ‘The Scab’, face Pickering
    had a huge Semitic nose,
    and if you’ve read his ‘fractals’,
    you have seen how much he trolls.

    Both of his fellow Splooges,
    Deception and Snidely Dunce,
    try to support poor scab face.
    That’s why we all call them cunts.

    Then one lonely Christmas Eve,
    Captain Deception cried,
    ‘Scab face, your butt hole’s so tight.
    Won’t you ride my ass tonight?’

    Then Snidely Duncecap splooged them.
    And they all shouted out with glee,
    ‘We are the group’s Three Splooges,
    and all we do is Bukake!’

    – Corey Connor, 2017

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