FEAR Oh! Feeling Extremely Anxious over Rubbish

Hello everyone,

After a couple of months spent writing The Honest Truth, I truthfully, was kinda spent. So I spent the entire weekend mulling over what I should write next. I didn’t want to write without an idea, and I didn’t want an idea unworthy of my newly found voice… So this is what I came up with:

F.E.A.R Oh! Feeling Extremely Anxious over Rubbish

Because if there’s one thing I learnt from The Honest Truth, it’s that fear is often extremely, EXTREMELY, overrated.

I was afraid to write so publicly about my worries… but when I finally did, I got some of the greatest responses I’ve ever gotten. People called me to check up on me, they gave me advice, they told me stories, and most importantly, they bonded with me on a deeper level than ever before.

Because I took a risk, I found better friends in the friends I already had, better relatives in the family I already knew, and tons of inspiration from near and from afar… and it is all thanks to God! But I am not here to preach to you, I am here to talk about this paralyzing thing called “fear.”

Scientifically speaking, fear is an exaggerated emotion, for an exaggerated response. Pounding hearts, Darting eyes, Full on sprints… these are the images that we associate with fear. Too often, like me, we imagine this kind of action, when in reality, our response is usually inaction.

Because we are afraid of what people will feel, we do not say.Because we are afraid of which people will see, we do not do. Because we are afraid of how people will react, we cannot act. Because we are afraid of people… we cannot be. This is one of the truths that came out of my experience.

True, there is nothing wrong with a little caution. Being careful enough to determine the right time, and the right place, to act, or say, or do what you want, is a wonderful skill called tact. A skill that every parent wishes their children had from birth! Am I Right!?

God bless the tactful!

But as parents know, tact is not a talent. It is a skill. They teach their children not to act out of turn, with some discipline. They teach their children not to speak out of place, with some discipline… So much so, that we are all intrinsically familiar with the term “discipline.”

Yet parents cannot prepare us for everything. So we enter the real world kinda sorta prepared, yet kinda sorta afraid. Ready for everything we’ve trained for, and afraid of everything we haven’t. Prepared for everything we know, and scared of everything we don’t. Which brings us back to “fear.” Because now, I’ve just outlined what fear really means:

  1. You don’t understand it.
  2. You haven’t trained for it.

Which means, that to overcome our fears, we only have 2 choices:

  1. Learn more about it.
  2. Do more of it.

…and frankly both options are scary.

Because if either fails, you’ll end up looking stupid, or foolish, or both…

But who’s to say you’ll be either? And even if you are both, it only means you need to do more research, and more training. So get out there and face your fears! I will be here saying a silent prayer for you:

May your choices reflect who you want to be
May your choices reflect who you want to be

Damola Mabogunje

Software Engineer by day, Blogger, Poet and Author, by night, I spend my days writing everything from the convex comma, to highly complex code.

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